Simplify Choosing Guardians For Your Children

A comprehensive estate plan protects what matters most to you. With Thanksgiving around the corner, many of us are beginning to reflect on all the precious things in life we’re thankful for. This includes our family, especially our children.

Providing for the care of your children is an essential piece of a comprehensive estate plan. Naming a guardian for your children is a difficult, but necessary decision that ensures your children are cared for in the way that you’d want. 

Take a few minutes to consider right now: if both you and your child’s other parent were to become incapacitated or die right now, who would step forward to care for your child? Would that be who you would want to raise your child, if you could not? Is that who you would want to take care of the financial assets you are leaving behind?

And, what about the short-term? Are your children often left in the care of a babysitter who would have no idea what to do if you didn’t make it home at the end of the evening? If not, even if you have named legal guardians, your child could be taken into the care of strangers if something happens to you, while the authorities figure out what to do. 

Simple Steps to Help Choose Guardians:

1. Make a list and rank your choices

Come up with a list of all the potential candidates for guardian, and narrow down the list to your top five people. There’s no guarantee that your ideal candidate(s) will be willing to serve as a guardian, so having more than one or two is a practical necessity.

To aide in this process, you should consider things, such as who really loves your children and who do your kids get along with? Will this person be physically, mentally, and emotionally… financially… able to raise your kids to adulthood? Take into account values, as well as, location and try not to automatically rule out considering unmarried friends or even distant relatives as the best people for the job. Really consider all your options. The most important thing is to choose SOMEONE, even if you aren’t 100% sure about them since you can always select a new guardian later.

Then rank your choices from the top choice down to last. Backups are critical in case your first choice cannot serve.

2. Sit down with top candidates and discuss what’s involved

When it comes to asking someone to be your child’s guardian, you need to provide crystal-clear guidance about what’s involved. The discussion should cover all of your expectations about how you want your kids raised. Speak openly about finances, discipline, education, spirituality, and any needs that are unique to your children. 

Once the discussion is complete, give them a few days to carefully consider the choice, even if they seem immediately gung-ho about doing it. Depending on the age of your kids, this could be a more than decade-long commitment. If they don’t carefully think it over, the responsibility can easily turn into resentment. 

3. Legally document your plan

It’s essential to legally document your choice as soon as possible. Verbal commitments mean nothing in the eyes of the law. This is especially true when you name a friend over a family member.

What happens if you haven’t named a legal guardian?

If you haven’t named a legal guardian for your children then the courts would step in and appoint one. Judges try to work in the best interests of the children and appoint who they think is most appropriate. The appointed party may not be whom you’d actually prefer. 

Unfortunately, even if you have made the hard decisions and worked with a lawyer to name legal guardians in a Will, your kids could still be at risk. Wills do not take into account what happens in the event you become incapacitated. Also, if your named guardians all live far from your home, it wouldn’t protect against anyone who may challenge your decisions. The only way to ensure your kids are raised by the people you want, in the way you want, never taken into the care of strangers (even temporarily) and that your kids would never be raised by anyone you wouldn’t want, is by creating a comprehensive estate plan.

If you are ready to take that step, start by sitting down with us. Working with a trusted attorney will ensure your entire family is protected and cared for no matter what. Contact us today to get started!